That's what I feel like today. I'm being grouchy. I think it's because I had a busy (note: NOT relaxing) weekend, helping a friend who desperately needed it, I missed the Toronto BlueJays/Diamondbacks game that I got free tickets to (Thanks again, H!) because I was otherwise occupied with this person, and didn't get to have ANY playtimes, even though my phone was a-ringing. So. I'm sitting here, bleary-eyed at the computer, drinking a huge mug of hot tea, and hoping for the sake of my sanity that I get to have a playtime (or many of them) today to easy my stress. As I was penning one of my ads today, I realized how lucky I am that I have been able to build my life into one big sexual fantasy. WOW. How many people get to say that?
I didn't kick my way out of the kinky closet until I was in my mid-20's or so, even though I knew I was "different" by around the age of 5yrs. I still have a few of the friends I've had since middle school, and I'm blessed enough that they know about my life, and never once turned away from me. My mom knows, my grandma knew until she passed on, my sisters know, my uncle knows, my cousins, etc, and they all still love me, and as long as I'm safe and happy, are perfectly ok with it (well, ok, my devout fundamentalist baptist older sister might have SOME issues with it-bless her, she's trying very hard to stay respectful and not be too pushy when it comes to saving my soul). The cherry on top of the sundae is that I have a wonderful man that I've been with almost 7 years, and he loves me more than anything and that's not going to change anytime soon. I don't know why I'm ruminating so much on this, I guess because I was trying to justify my grumpiness today, and instead, came up with a whole bunch of reasons why I most definitely should NOT be. Sigh. Being a realist sucks sometimes.
On a much lighter note, I can't wait for the next humiliation session!!! I just received an anal-ring toss game in the mail, and it'll be so fun to make some poor boy wear it while I kick back and practice my aim. Maybe, if there's anyone else home, I'll even grab my boyfriend, or roommates or any friends visiting and have them come into the playroom and they can play, too!! I can't wait to laugh at how silly that's going to look.